A Mother’s Love.

jeannie — Sun, 06 May 2018 08:20:43 +0000

Stepping In For Her Mama.

You just found a stray puppy or kitten, or maybe you’ve just adopted a newly weened puppy or kitten from a shelter or breeder. Now what do you do?! Either way, if Mama’s not in the picture now, you need to help this little one feel safe and secure. Puppies and kittens are cute, adorable, huggable, snuggable, and fun, but they still are young and delicate and desperately missing their mama. You’re wondering if you’ll be able to comfort her as she begins to let go of the memory of her natural mama and starts seeing you as her family now.

Of course you can! 🙂

The baby has just arrived at her new home with you, and you’re happy and excited. But her mama’s not there with her, and she’s feeling vulnerable and afraid. She doesn’t really know you yet, and trust takes time to grow. You need to fill that gap for her in the meantime, reassure her, comfort her, to help her grow up happy and well adjusted. Her wellbeing needs to be priority one-more important right now than how cute and entertaining she is.

If your little one doesn’t get this basic comfort at the start, she could grow up to be neurotic or ill-behaved. And neurotic and ill-behaved pets eventually end up abandoned at the shelter, or God forbid, even out on the streets. But let me encourage you-that won’t happen to you, because your heart is so filled and overflowing with love for this little furball, and you will put all that love to work protecting and taking the best care of her. So, put on your Mama hat and here are several tips you can start using right away. 🙂

First, Be Present.

Just like having a human baby, raising a furry youngster is not a part-time gig. You are on-call 24/7 just the same and need to take that commitment seriously, for the long-term.

Okay, so the last thing you want to do is put Baby off by herself. She needs your physical company, your touch. Whenever you’re at home, be next to her, touching her, letting her know you’re paying attention, and she’s safe and loved. Not the kind of hovering love that feels overly needy and worrysome. But the kind of love that says, hey little bambino, I see you, let’s hang together.

If you get busy and feel tempted to put her in a crate so you can vacuum or pay bills, etc., here’s a better option: put her in a sling or backpack and “wear” her while you work. Your body warmth, your scent, your heartbeat, your pulse, and your movement will comfort her and she’ll feel safe, connected, and loved. So, even though you’re focused on something else, you’re still present and comforting and being a good Mama, and getting your chores done at the same time.

NOTE: This practice also works beautifully to comfort smaller senior pets that may be blind or otherwise disabled and unsure of their surroundings.

What About When I Have To Be Gone?

Probably you work outside the home, so Baby will have to be without you for a good chunk of time every day, unless you plan to bring in a petsitter for her. A winning idea is to put an old-fashioned tick-tock clock next to her crate. The ticking will imitate Mama’s heartbeat. If you don’t have a tick tock clock, then set your stereo or tv on a station that plays only nature sounds. Set the volume down low so that it feels soothing to her, and doesn’t agitate.

VERY IMPORTANT: also put a blanket with your scent on it in her crate for her to snuggle up in. She’ll feel like you’re there with her. Your pajamas, a tee shirt, whatever. Something you slept in all night, or wore all day, so your scent is heavy on it. Change the item up every day to keep your scent strong, and don’t let it fade away. The benefit of this tip cannot be over-stated.

Bath Time.

If you’ve ever watched a Mama cat or dog groom her babies, you can see how it comforts the little one. You can easily imitate Mama’s grooming by using a damp cloth to massage Baby. Focus on Baby’s eyes, nose, mouth, ears, and bottom, just like her biological Mama does. Massage gently in a repetitious motion and Baby won’t know the difference between her real Mama and her new human Mama.

Sing To Baby.

While you’re imitating Baby’s biological Mama, you can “sing” to Baby, too. I’ve found that babies are super comforted and peaceful when I put my face against them and hum softly into their skin. It mimics purring just like their first Mama. It works with kittens and puppies both. I rub my face against their skin, back and forth, while I hum real soft and low. And in a minute Baby’s eyes become droopy and Baby nods off to sleep because she feels safe and sound with you. Avoid using a shrill, high-pitched voice when you talk to her.

Bed Time.

Don’t leave Baby in a laundry room or outside or wherever. She’s your family now. Bring Baby into your room with you. Put her crate as close to your bed as possible. Talk to her. Reach down and pet her to let her know you’re with her and watching over her. Whatever she needs to feel comforted–give her.

If Baby is super tiny, be cautious about having her sleep in bed with you initially, unless you’re a really light sleeper and can “sleep with one eye open” so you don’t accidentally roll over on her, or so she doesn’t fall of the bed. If her crate or carrier is small enough to put up on the bed next to you, that would be ideal.

These are just a handful of tips to get you started as a devoted new Mama. Hopefully they get your creative juices flowing and you can think of more ideas that will help you comfort and reassure your new little one.

I wish the very best for you and your new family. Enjoy her in happiness and good health! 🙂

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God Bless and Happy Pet Parenting!

With love and good wishes,
jeannie. ?

About jeannie: I’ve been pro-actively involved in pet rescue all of my life. I founded Milagro Senior Pet Refuge© (Phoenix) in 1998, and BareFootPets (TM) in 2008. Animal welfare has always been and will always be my heart’s work. If my only legacy is that I save a handful of precious souls that would not survive otherwise, I’m good with that.

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Can I Ever Love Another Pet?

jeannie — Sun, 18 Mar 2018 08:42:15 +0000

Losing Her Hurt So Much.

First, let me say God Bless You for sharing your heart with an animal whose very existence depended on you.

“I don’t think I could ever love another pet–it just hurt too much when I lost her.” I hear this often. People mistakenly think that, because their heart was wounded by the loss of a beloved pet once, that that’s the end for them. Love has moved out of their reach forever. You know, I talked in an earlier post about the price of love. The price of love is grief. And this is true–our grief over losing our pets is deep because our bond with them was equally deep. That’s as it should be. And we are very mistakenly afraid of grief. It’s just a natural human process. It doesn’t last forever, it doesn’t kill you, and it shouldn’t be feared any more than happiness. Each of these emotions have their season. Grief is the evidence of our love. Don’t be afraid to let your broken heart cry. Time will truly heal you, and time will truly let you love again.

Mikel, My Heart, My Soul (May 6 2000-Oct 2 2017)

Short Answer–YES! You CAN Love Another Pet!

Know this–your heart had love to give to an animal once, and it will absolutely have more than enough love to give again to another. One of the beauties of love is it’s endless–it’s boundless. Love never runs out. Even though your heart is grieving for one pet now does not mean your capacity to love another is lost. On the contrary–grief means your heart is busy healing so that it can get back to work and love again, because that’s what hearts do. Love is not selfish–it’s in its purest and truest form when it is loving another. You’ll feel more empty and unhappy if you DON’T let yourself love again. These are not just Hallmark phrases–these are truths that I personally have discovered firsthand, and you can trust them.

Allow The Grieving Process To Work Its Way Through So You Can Become Healed And Happy.

So please be open to the possibility. Acknowledge that the heart has a very distinct purpose. Our hearts want to be doing what they do best–falling in love, not running fearfully away from another love because it might hurt again. Why would you deny your heart doing the one thing it’s created to do? That would be like denying your eyes vision for fear of what you might see, or denying your lungs breath for fear of pollution. It is not protection when we deny ourselves such basic needs; it’s denial, and denial prolongs grief, and you find yourself stuck in it and miserable and never healing … until you open your heart back up again. That’s just the way it is.

The Best Way To Heal.

To get back in the game and rescue another little soul that might not survive if you don’t say yes … well, there’s no greater way to help your heart heal.
So keep your heart and your eyes open. Your next love is probably right there waiting … for you. 🙂